Nothing says "do your patriotic duty and get out the vote" like someone who is barely awake and hasn't even left the house yet, right? Well, go ahead and vote. Just make sure you get back in time to catch some great TV tonight. Sure, every actual Houston team isn't playing tonight, but your TV will feel lonely without you. And you paid a lot more money for it then you did for your wife's wedding ring. Unless your priorities are out of whack.
Swept Into Office
ESPN's E:60: 6:00 PM, ESPN - An in-depth profile of Andre Johnson awaits. It's your one chance to hear him speak above a whisper, so make sure to catch it.
Champions League: Tottenham @ Internazionale: 2:45 PM, FSC - I've got my Gareth Bale effigy all lined up, how about you?
Champions League: Copenhagen @ Barcelona: 2:45 PM, FSC (Tape Delay) - Copenhagen decided that we'd be in Rio for the 2016 Olympics, and Barcelona hosted the 1992 Olympics. Yes, I'm doing everything in my power to avoid having to look up soccer players this morning.
San Jose Sharks @ Minnesota Wild: 7 PM, Versus - Cheer on the Houston Aeros' parent team as they take on the most misunderstood logo in sports. Doesn't the shark need the hockey stick to play? Why is he biting into it?
Memphis Grizzles @ Los Angeles Lakers: 10:30 PM, NBA TV - Mike Conley's untradeable contract makes its NBA debut in Los Angeles.
Nova: Trapped In An Elevator: 7 PM, PBS - Sadly this show is probably about actual elevators and isn't a To Catch A Predator spin-off.
Kathy Griffin: Whores On Crutches: 9 PM, Bravo - If for whatever reason you are not in the mood tonight, but your significant other is and won't stop bothering you, Kathy Griffin's voice has been scientifically proven to kill sex drives for a night.