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Texans' Lack Of Swagger Comes Back To Haunt Them In Madden

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While the Texans continue to make strides on the field, they are running into problems off of it. Nobody is in trouble, no, but we are severely lacking in swagger. Which is, of course, a new stat in Madden 2010.

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As for what "swagger" does for you, word has it that it's a kind of confidence rating, so if that player is involved in a big play or a score, he gets an attribute boost for a few plays after that. How long or how much is governed by how much juice he's got.

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Of course, how does one measure swagger? Well, Old Spice, the sponsor of swagger, also didn't have much of a clue. As evidenced by this list of bizarre qualities:

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•â‡¥Red Zone Performance: Scoring and Tackling when it counts requires Swagger on both sides of the ball
•â‡¥Taking Your Swagger on the Road: Winning a game while tens of thousands cheer against you requires massive amounts of Swagger
•â‡¥Fourth Down Conversions: It's fourth down. You have to have Swagger to go for it...and make it
•â‡¥ Gentleman's Game: It takes a different level of Swagger to play the game by the rules and avoid penalties
•â‡¥Merchandise Sales: When fans wear your team colors like a uniform, you definitely have Swagger

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How exactly does swagger mean you play like a gentleman? When I think of players described as having swagger, I think of guys with a mean attitude who end up drawing stupid penalties or making unsound strategical plays because they are hard-headed, only to have them explained away by dumb color commentators under the umbrella of swagger. You know, like this guy!

Images by eflon used in background images under a Creative Commons license. Thank you.