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Meet the Newest (Fake) Defensive Coordinator

A friend of mine is a Cowboys fan and listens to a sports radio station up there all the time. There's obviously no accounting for taste, and I'm certainly not condoning anything Dallas-related. With the firing and hiring of Wade Phillips, though, he passed along some of the best The Ticket has to offer.


See, one of their recurring bits is to have Fake Jerry Jones call in to talk with them along with Fake Wade. Inevitably, Fake Wade would say something dumb, like "I can't find the city of Bye on a map, Jerry. Where are we going to play this Bye Week?" and Jerry inevitably tries to hit him in the head with a snow shovel or put scorpions in his coaching hat. It was all fun and games til Wade got hired by the Texans.


Now, I just have to go with the joke. They're pretty funny. By far the best line was from a year or two ago, when Jerry asked Wade what the team record was and he responded, "Well, Jerry, I think it's 10 pounds. Jason Witten caught that one on that lake near the stadium."


Don't take my word for it. Check out the archives here. That's our new (fake) defensive coordinator, people. God help us all.

Images by eflon used in background images under a Creative Commons license. Thank you.