What to watch while you're trying on big gloves in the grocery store like the apocalypse is coming even though it's only going to be 25 tonight...
Local
-Houston Rockets @ Los Angeles Lakers -- 9:30 PM, NBA TV/FS Houston -- Someone let Luis Scola that rather than looking for gold in the locker room, he should try to find some on the floor, then tell him he has to play defense to find it.
-Marshall Thundering Herd @ Houston Cougars -- 8 PM, CBS College Sports -- Can someone please pull the Coogs out of this tailspin?
NHL
-Pittsburgh Penguins @ New York Rangers -- 6:30 PM, Versus -- Versus was going to show the New York Islanders-Atlanta Thrashers game, but hey, why not show every Penguins-Rangers game this year?
-Phoenix Coyotes @ San Jose Sharks -- 9 PM, Versus -- The battle for mediocrity! Which team can distinguish itself from the rest of the 59-55 point owning West?
Football
-Arsenal vs. Everton -- 1:30 PM, Fox Soccer Channel -- If Arsenal continues to keep stealing people from Soton, I'll have no choice but to send form letters asking they politely find other teams to plunder.
-Milan vs. Lazio -- 1:40 PM, ESPN3.com -- Sure, Lazio are playing over their head. That doesn't mean you can't root for them against Milan.
-Manchester United vs. Aston Villa -- 2 PM, ESPN2 -- After bringing in Michael Bradley at the transfer deadline, Villa is about to realize that money won't buy you true love, only kids that are prematurely bald.
College Basketball
-Purdue Boilermakers @ Wisconsin Badgers -- 6 PM, ESPN -- You picked a bad time to try to be nationally relevant in Wisconsin, guys.
-Vanderbilt Commodores @ Florida Gators -- 8 PM, ESPN -- Two teams clearly jockeying for #10 seeds in reality, but it looks like ESPN has them as a #5 and a #6, respectively.
-North Carolina Tar Heels @ Boston College Eagles -- 8 PM, ESPN3.com -- I don't want to say the Eagles are a bad defensive team, but rumor has it their best defender, after all these years, is still Troy Bell.
-Penn St. Nittany Lions @ Illinois Fighting Illini -- 8 PM, Big Ten Network -- Demetri McCaney tries to save the Illini from their own downspiral.
-Kentucky Wildcats @ Mississippi Rebels -- 6 PM, ESPNU -- DeAndre Liggins would be a great name for a butler.
-Baylor Bears @ Oklahoma Sooners -- 6 PM, ESPN2 -- I was thinking about saying "this would have been a better game in 2005," but then I remembered that Baylor wasn't good then.
-Maine Black Bears @ Boston U. Terriers -- 6:30 PM, ESPN3.com -- Maine is dominating in conference play, and it probably has something to do with Murphy Burnatowski having a great name for a buddy cop sitcom.
-Kansas Jayhawks @ Texas Tech Red Raiders -- 8 PM, ESPNU -- I suppose Texas Tech could technically have a chance, so long as Brady Morningstar takes 30 shots.
-Creighton Bluejays @ Bradley Braves -- 7 PM, ESPN3.com -- Bradley's only lost 11 games in a row. Sure! Anything can happen!