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Les Miles Tells Texas A&M, Missouri, To 'Strap It Up' For SEC Welcome

LSU head coach Les Miles would like the SEC's newest teams to know that things are going to be really, REALLY... NOT NICE THIS FALL:

As for Texas A&M and Missouri joining the SEC: "I would say strap it up," Miles said. "They're going to really not enjoy their welcoming to this conference."

If this offends you, Texas A&M or Missouri fan, it's only because you're not used to him yet. The other 11 conference school's fans (and a good number of LSU supporters as well) wouldn't bat an eye if "The Hat" began to slowly consume his own microphone the next time he's interview on live television, all while citing the little known nutritional value of aluminum and sheet metal, per his good friend Jack Lalane.

Miles is, despite winning a national title game and making it to another, a media savant the likes of a lovechild spawned by your drunk uncle and "Anchorman's" Brick Tamland. We imagine someone told him to tone down the bizarre quirkiness and amp up the cold war politician's demeanor after being shut down by Alabama in January, and this what he offered up.

Over time, you'll grow not to notice the fact that Miles' public demeanor startingly resembles the oprhaned idiot savant of a Hallmark film, but that same man wins an alarming amount of football games.

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